Is the husband head of his wife? There is constant debate and controversy over this thought. People tend to try and explain it away, argue it, remind you that the Bible says husband and wife should submit to each other (Ephesians 5:21) but when it all comes down to it this verse is still there. Paul writes it quite clearly: "...the husband is head of the wife...". He even compares the relationship of husband and wife to Christ and the church. So why is this argued against so much if it is written so clear?
I believe that this idea is argued against simply because it is misunderstood. People think that the husband being head of the wife means that there is an inequality between the husband and wife role. They think that it means that the husband has a right to order his wife around anytime he wants to and can make decisions against his wife's wishes. This is not what it means at all. In order to better understand the role that Paul is describing for husbands let's take a look at the example he mentions, Christ as head of the church.
"just as the Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve and to give His life as a ransom for many." - Matthew 20:28
Here we see Christ's purpose of coming on this earth. He didn't come to be a master that demanded service. In fact if you read through the Gospels Christ never demanded service from anyone. There were times when he accepted service but he never demanded it. On the other hand Christ was constantly serving others. He played and prayed with people's kids, healed people, sat down with people and ate, taught life principles, provided food for the multitudes, and set people free from demonic oppression. In fact there was one instance where someone was serving him and he implied that she should stop and just spend time with him instead (Luke 10:38-42).
So when Paul says that the husband is the head of the household it does not mean that the husband should come home and demand the house to be clean and the dinner to be made and the kids to be quiet, it actually means quite the opposite. When Paul says that husbands should be head of the wife like Christ it means husbands should be playing with the kids, praying with his family, teaching his family, praying for healing, spending time and eating meals with the family, and providing food for his family and guests. Then when the husband takes his rightful role the wife submits to his prayer, teaching, and service and together they train their kids in the way that they should go (Proverbs 22:6)